Although you’re not likely to see a vibrator, dildo, or other adult toy featured in your average gift guide, they can make terrific gifts. After all, they’re everything a solid gift choice should be, right? They’re useful, they’re thoughtful, and they’re incredibly enjoyable. And if you choose the right recipient, a toy is bound to be appreciated, as well.

However, that’s the rub – figuring out whether a toy is actually an appropriate gift for whomever you’ve got in mind. Here’s a look at some of the most important considerations to keep in mind while you mull over the situation.

Consider who you’re buying for.

Most people thinking of giving a sex toy as a gift have a spouse or other long-term partner in mind as the recipient, but this isn’t a hard and fast rule. Plenty of folks have friendships or relationships with family members that involve a certain level of sexual frankness. And if you have the kind of relationship with your best friend or your sister where gifting a sex toy makes sense, you likely already know it.

Always err on the side of caution, though. If there’s any doubt in your mind as to whether a toy would land well as a gift, it’s probably best to assume that it wouldn’t and choose something else. When in doubt, talk to the person first to get a feel for how they might react. Never blindside someone with a gift like a sex toy if the topic has never come up between you before, even if you are in a relationship.

Think about their likes and dislikes.

If you’re considering buying someone a few fun sex toys as a gift, then you hopefully know at least a bit about their personal likes and dislikes. For example, will the toy you’re buying be their very first, or do they already have a robust collection that you’re looking to add to for them? Have they mentioned being curious about something specific? What else do you know about how they enjoy being stimulated when it’s time to get down and dirty?

If a sex toy really would make a good gift for this person, you should be able to answer questions like that about them with ease. If you can’t, it’s probably best to wait until you can, even if you’re already in a relationship with them. As wonderful as it can be to receive a toy from a trusted long-time lover, it can be awkward if the two of you haven’t been together long or are still getting used to being sexual together.

Consider the presentation of the gift.

Although it’s incredibly healthy to be open and honest about sex, there’s still an appropriate time and place to present someone with a vibrator or other adult toy as a gift. That time and place should not involve opening the gift in a crowded restaurant, at work, or in front of a living room full of relatives and kids.

Whether you’re giving the toy to your beloved partner or a good friend who you’re sure will really appreciate it, this is a personal exchange. Assume that your recipient would rather receive it in private. You want them to have time to check it out and for you to be able to share a few words as to why you picked exactly this option for them. Adding some thoughtful touches the person may need – like batteries (if required) or a storage bag – is often a nice gesture, as well.

Choose your occasion carefully.

Sex toys make much better fits for some occasions than others. For instance, they’re ideal for nearly any romantic experience shared between couples who know one another well, especially if that occasion will likely include sexual activity at some point. Think Valentine’s Day, wedding nights, or anniversaries. They can also be good fits for options like bachelorette parties under certain circumstances.

On the other hand, a toy may not be the best fit for other occasions that call for a more wholesome approach to gift-giving. For example, a toy doesn’t have the right tone for Mother’s Day or any similar occasion, regardless of your relationship with the recipient.

Go with your gut.

Ultimately, you’re the one who knows your recipient best. So if you feel like they’d absolutely adore a vibrator or other toy as a gift, go with your instincts. Just be sure to consider the person’s likes and dislikes, as well as their comfort level with any potential presentation circumstances. For example, gifting a vibrator may be less shocking than giving sex furniture like a Liberator!

Sex toys may seem like extraordinary options to wrap up and present as gifts, but they’re a lot like any other creative, clever gift solution. Getting things right is all about knowing the person you’re buying for well enough to know what they’d genuinely like.