Even in the most loving, long-term relationships, it’s natural for bedroom routines to settle into familiar patterns. But sexual wellness is about exploration as much as it is about connection. If you’re feeling a bit stuck in a cycle or simply want to elevate intimacy, introducing toys into your relationship can be a playful, exciting and deeply rewarding way to reconnect and rediscover each other.
Why Consider Toys?
Sex toys aren’t just for solo sessions or risqué adventures. They’re tools – tools for pleasure, discovery, and better communication. Whether it’s enhancing what already works or exploring new sensations together, they can add variety and increase intimacy. Many couples find that adding toys helps them feel more adventurous, more open, and in some cases, even closer emotionally.
Starting the Conversation
If toys haven’t featured in your relationship before, you might feel unsure about bringing it up. The key is approaching the topic openly and without pressure. Try something like:
“I was reading about how some couples use toys to mix things up a bit. Would you ever be open to trying something like that together?”
Framing it as an idea to explore together helps keep the mood playful and cooperative, rather than intimidating or suggestive of dissatisfaction.
Choose Together
Shopping for toys can actually be part of the fun. Browse online or visit a reputable boutique together. You’ll be surprised how many options are designed with couples in mind – think vibrating rings, wearable toys, or remote-controlled devices that allow for mutual enjoyment.
If you’re starting out, keep it simple. You don’t need to dive into the deep end with elaborate gear. Popular starter toys for couples include:
- Bullet vibrators: Small, discreet, and perfect for external stimulation.
- Couples’ vibrators: Designed to be worn during intercourse to enhance pleasure for both partners.
- Massage wands: Not only for bedroom play, but great for full-body relaxation too.
- Remote-controlled toys: Add a sense of spontaneity or even a little tease when you’re out and about.
Make It Comfortable
Set the scene so the first experience feels natural and enjoyable. This might include:
- Choosing a quiet, private time when there are no distractions
- Keeping the atmosphere relaxed – perhaps with soft lighting, music, or your favourite scent
- Having a laugh if things feel a bit awkward – remember, it’s all part of learning together
Communication is essential. Check in with each other during and after. What felt good? What didn’t quite land? It’s all helpful feedback that strengthens your connection.
Break the Routine, Not the Bond
Using toys isn’t about fixing something that’s broken. It’s about expanding what’s already good. They can help you discover new erogenous zones, introduce new rhythms, or simply make things feel fresh again.
And as an added bonus, exploring this side of your relationship can bring you closer outside the bedroom too. You’re trying something new together, which builds trust and shared experience.
Final Thoughts
Injecting more fun into the bedroom doesn’t need to be dramatic or overly daring. Sometimes, just a small change – like trying a toy together – can reignite desire and open the door to a more exciting, satisfying sex life.
So if you’ve been curious but hesitant, consider this your gentle nudge. There’s a whole world of pleasure out there, and it’s waiting to be explored – together.
