What to do if My Partner is Too Big for Me
It might happen to you. You met a lovely person on an app, or you’re set up by a friend, or you clumsily run into each other while holding a stack of papers like in a romantic comedy… however it happens, you might meet someone who’s well… great. You go on a few dates, you laugh, you smile, and eventually you decide to become intimate with them. You’re in your bedroom, the lights are dimmed, he begins to take off his pants and… he’s more than you bargained for.
Women finding that their partners are too large for them is not uncommon and, most importantly, it does not mean that anything is wrong with either you or your partner. Everybody is built differently and some people are more well endowed than others. The good news is there are solutions available to you if you and your partner find yourself in this situation.
Your body naturally produces moisture which acts as a lubrication during sex. This lubrication reduces frictions, eases insertion and makes sex more enjoyable. And sometimes women will find that they either need more lubrication or they do not produce enough naturally. Thankfully, there are a wide variety of lubricants available that could help you with your problem. Choose a lube that is water based, low is osmolality, and free of dyes, perfumes and flavorings. A little extra liquid can go a long way.
If using a lubricant doesn’t help enough, you may want to try vaginal dilation therapy. Vaginal dilators are cylindrically shaped devices that a woman inserts into their vagina to help train their muscles to stretch and relax. They are graduated in sizes, meaning they start small and get bigger. The smallest ones are smaller than the average pinky finger. Overtime, you can work your way up to the size of your partner. Using that high quality lubricant we talked about earlier can also help with vaginal dilation therapy.
You might be saying, “this is great and all, but we have a problem with length, not width.” Well, there are solutions for that as well. Protector rings are great devices that limit how deep your partner is able to penetrate. They are comfortable silicone rings that the penetrating partner will wear to limit how far they can penetrate. Think of them like bumpers. They are very comfortable and may help you and your partner become more intimate. You can also try changing sexual positions, with the women on top. This also helps control the depth of penetration.
Just because your partner is more well-endowed than you might be used to, it does not mean that you two cannot be intimate. Take your time and consider adding lubrication, vaginal dilation therapy or protector rings into your lovemaking routine and you may find that there is now simply more to love.
Author bio- Jane Silverstein is the owner of Soul Source Therapeutic Devices located in Los Angeles. She is committed to women’s health issues and to helping women worldwide regain and/ or maintain their sexual health. She is passionate about helping others and has always been involved in a multitude of charitable causes.